


Forgotten Things

by Kariachi



Category: Ben 10 Series
Genre: M/M, also feels, i apologise for nothing, nothing graphic of course but just mentions of child abuse and experimentation and such, warning for essentially The Rooters Arc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-11-07
Packaged: 2019-01-30 21:54:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12662175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kariachi/pseuds/Kariachi
Summary: Getting memories back doesn't necessarily make thingsbetter...





	Forgotten Things

The last few weeks had been an awkward mess of jumbled memories and unbalanced information and long nights sleeping in the backseat. It had taken too long for their taste for them all to match up right, the memories that had come back. They came out of order, and in different orders for the two of them, and that was _not_ an added hassle anyone needed when on the run from corrupt law enforcement and trying to plan out how they were going to handle them. Between all of that and the fact they were constantly on the move, hours spent cramped up in the car, living off junk food, worried that the next gas station would be where they ended up making their last stand, Argit almost wished he hadn’t gotten involved.

Not that that ever would have happened. Even without his memories there was no chance Kevin would’ve been able to go on the run without him. Even if he’d tried, it wouldn’t have worked. Argit could always find him, had always been able to find him (and oh spirits guide him how much worse he felt about the shit he’d done the last few years, remembering now how many times he’d come to the rescue, risked himself to save him from the same sort’ve people he’d practically handed him on a platter to-) and would follow him to the end of the galaxy and back. Heck, at their worst they’d still always answered the phone when the other called, which he supposed was probably weird for other people, to not be talking unless somebody had a nightmare or an anxiety attack. 

But still, the point was that he would’ve gone on the run with Kevin even if he hadn’t been involved in this whole disaster himself, and the fact that he was was just making everything harder. It was bad enough having all these new old memories without being on the run from evil scientists, or not knowing whether the person you shared them with remembered yet. And the things he was remembering…

Labs, cages, experiments made up the worst of it. Things he could just barely remember from his nightmares, back in horrible detail, in _reality_. Things nobody should go through. Billings’s sadistic streak. Gnawing hunger. The new scars Kevin kept coming back with. The empty space behind his smile. How close they came to getting out, to Kevin finishing the job. How badly he’d wanted the human to just escape with him, to not go back where Argit knew damn well what happened to those no longer needed. Being snatched up again, after so many years of freedom. All the things that’d taken the anxiety that came from a childhood in the Null Void and amplified it, made it the disorder he couldn’t shake even after all the years he’d been out.

And all the things that turned his stomach into a dark pit of guilt, sorrow, anger. Memories from their time in the Null Void, from their time traveling the galaxy, that had been locked away because they didn’t serve Servantis’s plans. _Feelings_ that had been locked away because they didn’t serve his plans. Because Kevin wouldn’t get close enough to the Tennysons the way things were then, not with an existing support system, not with somebody to bounce some of their shittier actions off of, not with… All the trust they’d built up over the years. All the honest affection. That willingness to do anything for each other. That willingness for him to do anything for Kevin. _Anything_. Shoved aside, locked away because some evil jackass wanted a weapon, wanted to use his Kevin, his Ravrsa, his Moonshine, to kill Benny rather than just smear some peanut butter on the brat and be done with it. Because Servantis wanted to shove Kevin close to the Tennysons, needed him vulnerable after, isolated him to do it.

Because Kevin was more _useful_ with Gwen.

Feelings a whirling mass of awful in his chest and gut, Argit bit back again the urge to whine, just like he resisted the urge to burrow against Kevin. He wanted to, oh how he wanted to. To melt against him like he had before, nose stuffed under his chin, tail around his leg. To apologize for everything, every time he’d hurt him, every time he’d been less than what he deserved, every time he’d betrayed his trust. But, things were different now. There was a reason they hadn’t really talked about the history that was coming back, about the changes Servantis had made, beyond the randomness of how it all came back. Just, there was too much to say, too many words, not enough energy left to say them. And now, Kevin liked Gwen. After three years, even with a start built on lies there was affection in that relationship, and it wasn’t her fault, no matter how much Argit wanted it to be. For things to be easy. He let out a deep breath, just barely headbutting Kevin’s chest in the tight space that was all there was to sleep semi-comfortably, and tried to put together some combination of words that would get his point across.

“I, I missed you.” Kevin paused what he’d been doing- grooming out dead quills, something he’d done for years, social grooming at its best- going silent with his hand buried in Argit’s mane. After a moment he leaned up, leaving Argit to force himself not to think of the light brush of lips against the tattered old scar on his ear as a kiss, before settling back into his work.

“I missed you too.”


End file.
